Loving Lingerie as a Full-Bodied Woman

Today’s post will be short and sweet but something that’s been close to my heart and a favorite recently — lingerie. I wanted to talk about this topic because as a big girl, I know how our relationship can be with the more intimate pieces of clothing such as these. It can be a challenge for us bigger ladies to love it especially if most brands we know of are catered and only celebrated for those who are on the slimmer side. Not to mention, if we go out to shop for these nice little things, not all of our needs are not met. They don’t support our breast well or flatter our figure, and sometimes those two are enough to make us not think of lingerie that much.

Personally I’ve only been hooked with lingerie about a year ago. Partly because lingerie is always regarded as that piece of fabric only worn in the bedroom and specifically for your man or significant other, which wasn’t something I personally couldn’t be bothered with before.

My appreciation sparked when I saw the community of lingerie enthusiasts on Instagram. I saw lots of women (and there’s even a handful of men), of different races and of realistic sizes, who love lingerie because of how confident and sexy it makes them feel. At the same time, I learned to appreciate the beauty in the lingerie itself — the craftsmanship and the exquisite detailing of the fabrics. That’s the time that I saw lingerie as something else other than for a man’s eyes; it’s a tool to uplift someone’s confidence even further, a tool to pick up someone’s mood and a tool to make someone feel themselves without inhibition, without restriction. 

In the past year, I have collected a couple of sets and pieces that caught my eye, made me feel drop-dead gorgeous and made me love my curves and thickness even more. I would love to show my collection some time with you, as well as my favorite luxury lingerie brands that I treat myself with. But for now, here’s what I want you to take away from this post as a big-bodied gal who wants to learn to love and appreciate lingerie:

  • It doesn’t, and actually shouldn’t, matter what size you are in to rock a banging set of lingerie. I want you to even unsubscribe to the idea that there is a “bikini body” because any body in a bikini is a bikini body! Flabby or not, you have every right to put on that lingerie and feel unapologetically proud of what you see. 
  • Do not limit yourself to what is readily available in front of you. We’re lucky to be alive in a time where there are more and more brands who are revolutionizing the way we advertise lingerie. They have become more inclusive and sensitive to the needs of women coming from different sizes. I would highly encourage you to explore these brands because they make such beautiful lingerie with us big-bosomed ladies in mind.
  • On that same note, lingerie for bigger support doesn’t have to be dull, boring and grandma-looking! Brands such as Playful Promises, Bettie Fatal, What Katie Did UK, Hopeless Lingerie, Alexandrea Anissa, Mimi Holliday and Buttress & Snatch are some of my highly-recommended brands to check out for the most beautiful lingeries you would ever put your eyes on. 
  • However, I know what you might be thinking: these pieces are quite expensive! I understand, because I have the same thoughts. But remember, good pieces are kind of an investment. You’re not asked to hoard (although a tasteful collection of luxe lingerie is a dream of mine, LOL) and you’re not required at all to splurge if you do not want to but having a really good piece comes with a price, literally.
  • Do not be discouraged if you want to score some of these. There are lots of sale seasons spread throughout the year and great pieces up on listing websites such as Ebay or Depop every now and then that every enthusiasts flock and definitely take advantage of. I am only recommending them because I know they’re brands you can count on when it comes to quality and design.
  • Like what I shared with my tips for shopping as a big-bodied gal, it is crucial to know your size and be honest about it. Though the fit still differs from brand to brand or where they based their sizing from, having an idea of your fit helps a lot in getting the clothing that will work for you. Do not be easily discouraged and think that something’s not for you just because it doesn’t fit properly or frame you in the nice way. No one knows about what works for them overnight. It is a matter of trial and error too, honey. 
  • Most importantly, lingerie is supposed to be, first and foremost, for you! Not for anyone else, but yours!
  • And lastly, ladies, let’s stop wasting our time being harsh on ourselves. We’re not getting anything done by judging every bits and pieces that we hate seeing in the mirror. Let us instead fill our lives with love for what we are capable of; there’s a lot more to celebrate about our womanhood than just our physical attributes. 

I know it might take some time and getting used to to fully love and embrace our bodies in lingerie and these tips are just a scratch on the surface. The real process starts within ourselves. It all starts with changing our thought process and prejudices.

I would love to support you and any of your questions, concerns or comments about this topic. My confidence did not just appear out of nowhere, and I know that when I was struggling with self-confidence, I wanted someone to be my confidante and help me get through with it. I’d love to be yours.

Before I end this post, I’d like to introduce as well a new series for this coming months. It will be called “In the month of”, where I’d share with you what I’ve been up to for the whole month. This is where shows I’ve watched, products I’ve tried and loved, restaurants or places I’ve been to, people I’ve met or just experiences and lessons I’ve learned for that month will come in. It’s a fun summary of sorts. I might even add some wishlist of things I’d love to get my hands on this year, too. First post for that one will come up by either end of this month or first week of next month. If you have anything you want me to add on that post, let me know in the comments so I can add it.